They're Infiltrating Our School Systems o3o
by jhline
Summary: Ever so often, the nations enroll in a high school, college, or university (Depending on their outward appearance) for a semester to ensure that their knowledge is up-to-date. I mean, hey! Interaction with humans can't be all that bad! … Right? Rated T because I don't want to subject children to terrible language. I don't intend for this to be romantic... But, eh! It might be. XD
1. Chapter 1

**HELLO, MEINE KINDER! I've decided to do something again. This is one of my unfinished projects and whatnot. Don't... Expect me to updated frequently. I can really only write it in my free time. QwQ Also, if you happen to be a fan of my Fairy Tail fanfic 'Princess Stella', I AM SO, SO, SO, SO, SO, FREAKIN' SORRY! I really don't want to give up on it, but, like, I literally have NO CLUE what to do! Anyway, I'm sure the Hetalia fans are like, "Okay, so... Fanfiction? :D" Yeah. All right. XD**

**By now you should know that I don't own Hetalia. Silly you, it belongs to Hima-papa~**

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England let his head fall to the table with a resonating thud. Oh, no. Not again. It's too soon, right? When was the last time…?

"All right, dudes, it's time to mingle with the people!" An obnoxiously cheerful American voice called out, "France, don't rape too many things! Germany, don't wear your military uniform for once! Italy, don't sleep through all of your classes! Russia, you commie bastard, … Yeah, I don't actually have any advice for you, I just kind of wanted to call you that. China, do NOT haul that weird cat thing around with you everywhere! Japan, you're totally cool, bro! Iggy, don't pass out from all of those 'rebellious teenagers'! And don't bring a tea set and doily to class!"

The moment America shut up, all of the addressed nations (and others) began to speak at once:

"Mon cher, I do not rape-"

"VHAT?! AMERICA, YOU VILL NOT ADDRESS ME LIKE-"

"Veeeeee-? But you sleep through all your classes too, don't you-"

"Kolkolkolkolkolkolkolkolkolkolkol-"

"AIYAH, Shinatty-chan is NOT a weird cat thing, aru-"

"I agree with America-"

"JAPAN, GET YOUR OWN OPINIONS-"

"I-I- WHAT!?"

The Brit felt his face flush an uncomfortable shade of red. Just what did that brat take him for? An old grandma who had teatime every day at four, while watching the telly, and knitting, and stroking a fluffy cat, and… It really didn't help that England actually did do all of those things. The nation was forced back to reality by an overly-forceful pat on the back.

"Good luck, man!"

"You… You… YOU INSUFFERABLE PRAT!" England threw a punch at the grinning American, flaming with anger, only to have it playfully swatted away like a fly.

"Come on, old man. I've seen you cry for hours over the 'insolence of this generation.' Now you've gotta catch back up on the times! Have fun, dude!" The bespectacled blonde sent England a cheeky thumbs-up and wink.

The Brit simmered with barely-contained annoyance as the American sashayed out of the room, singing "Get Your Head In The Game" extremely off-pitch. Right as he was finally getting his breathing under control…

"Although, I do fear for ze poor students you will terrorize, Angleterre. They will 'ave to look at your disgusting eyebrows all da-"

The silky French voice halted after a British fist to the face. England left the room feeling a bit better as his mortal enemy fell to the floor unconscious.

England sighed as his peridot eyes fluttered shut. The next day, he was to attend the University of Oxford as an undergrad. For the twelfth time since 1096. It was a beautiful place, really, just like the rest of his country, but… He just couldn't stand so many ignorant, disrespectful people in one place. Sure, they were all, in their own respect, gentlemen and women. However there was one subject that England, along with most of the other countries, simply balked at taking: History. World History, Civics and Economics, English History, or whatever country's history it happened to be. They way they twisted the facts was… Was.. Well, ridiculous! England found it quite difficult to respect any of the professors for that subject. He often ended up wishing he could just teach it himself- He'd lived through most of it anyway! Unfortunately, he'd found out the hard way that any attempt to take over often lead to getting kicked out of the class. It just wasn't fair. There he was, the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, who'd ruled most of the world at some point, not able to run a single history classroom! This was why he disliked having to go to school. They were all ungrateful twats.

With that last, confirming thought, he rolled over in his elegantly-adorned, queen-sized bed and drifted off into a refreshing sleep.

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**Aaaaaaaand that's chapter one. Lemme know whatchu think! w I'm working on chapter two right now. Like. RIGHT now. XD But I probably won't actually get around to posting it for awhile. Please review. I need serious help with my writing. Constructive criticism is good for my health. QwQ**

**Anyway. Bye-bye~! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hah, I lied. I finished (Maybe? I don't really know what constitutes 'finished'. I hate waiting) the chapter and now I'm posting it. I feel proud. XD Now we notice the obvious centering of America and England's characters. Maybe I'll do something similar for other countries as a bonus chapter type thing... What do you think? OwO **

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_Brilliant. Fucking. Brilliant._

That pretty much summed up England's thoughts. He had just strolled into the lecture hall for his first class, which happened to be nuclear physics. England knew why he was expected to attend school. Although he didn't particularly agree, he understood. But he could simply not fathom why the hell a certain blonde, glasses-wearing, American stood at the front of the room, textbook in hand.

After getting several strange looks from the rest of his class, England took a deep breath and seated himself nearer to the front of the room. It took a lot of willpower and concentration for him to not run up to America, flip his desk over, and start berating him for being in his country at all.

The intruding nation glanced up from his book, meeting England's eyes. He grinned quite conspicuously and winked. This class was going to be living Hell.

"ALL RIGHT, GUYS!" The loud, commanding voice broke through the Brits brooding, "This class is about nuclear physics, if you don't belong here, I suggest you leave. Seriously, get out. You're not wanted."

Even his opening speech made England want to slide down in his chair. To think that he had raised the boy, who now stood before him, yelling in that obnoxious accent of his. It was like he was mocking the fact that he didn't belong to Britain anymore.

The Englishman slapped his own face lightly. He really needed to stop thinking about ruling the world.

"My name is Alfred F. Jones, I am your professor. Although my name is already cool, you will refer to me as 'Mr. USA'. I will not respond to 'Mr. Jones,' that is a name for old people, not wicked awesome nuclear physics teachers."

There were a few distinctly female giggles heard around the room.

"_Damn, if my citizens aren't encouraging the brat._" England glowered at the American. He was so out of place. What was he even doing here? He was supposed to be a student as some American school, back in AMERICA. Not teaching science at the University of Oxford!

The click and fizz of a soda can opening cut off his thought process. A murmur went through the class.

"I tend to talk kinda fast, so get your notes, or computers, or tablets, or whatever you guys use, out now! I know it's the first day and all, but we're still doing some serious learning!" 'Alfred F. Jones' took a swig of his Pepsi, and sighed.

That was not okay.

Professors do not eat or drink while they teach. Not in Britain's school system. Not here. He was not putting up with it.

"Excuse me, sir, but I don't think it's practical or a good idea in general for you to drink soda while teaching. There is a no food or drink policy in this auditorium." England abruptly stood to his feet, hurriedly stating his opinion.

America blinked at him, before putting the can down on his desk, "And you are…?"

The Brit blinked back. _Who… Was he? Was he- Oh!_

"Ar- Arthur. Kirkland. Sir."

"And I am…?" The blonde gestured emphatically at himself.

England frowned, "Alfred F. Jones."

"Mr. USA," he corrected, "Also known as your teacher. Also known as the boss of you. Also known as the person telling you to sit down. If you have some weird allergic reaction to me drinking Pepsi in your vicinity, then I will gladly stop. But, bro. You're fine. I'm fine. We're all fine. Now let's commence the learning process." He turned to his laptop.

A chorus of _Ohhhh_s surrounded England's appalled, flushing face. He slowly sunk to his seat, trying to comprehend what just happened.

This boy is going to get it as soon as we leave this school.

* * *

"Mr. USA," England said, irritated, to the blonde who was packing his stuff. The rest of the students had already left, leaving the two nations alone in the hall.

"Yeah, bro, it's a totally cool idea, don't ya' think?" America responded in his usual, annoyingly peppy tone, "I just got the whole campus to call me by my actual name without them suspecting a single thing! I'd make a freakin' awesome spy!"

"It's a terrible, immature idea," England deadpanned, "Just like you. What the bloody hell are you doing here anyway?!"

The younger nation held up his smartphone with a very serious expression, as if the device completely answered any and all of the Brit's questions.

"You have a phone," he observed, "Good for you."

America woke the phone up and unlocked it then showed England the screen again, same visage adorning his features.

The older man squinted.

"Online college courses? Are you kidding me?! What happened to 'mingle with the people'?!"

"What?" America pocketed his phone once more and continued to gather his things, "I am mingling with the people. I'm mingling with my students. Besides, man, the whole thing is about staying solid with what's going on. Really, I got this." He sent a cheeky grin at England.

The Brit grit his teeth. [A/N: Ooh, that rhymed! XD]

"And out of any school in the world, you had to end up at Oxford University, teaching the first class I take after I wake up. This is bloody unfair! I don't want to be here! I'd much rather be in my living room with a cup of Earl Grey! I have to sit in a room with a British History professor and listen to them blemish my name! And you just lay on your bed, on your phone, and do your duty from there!" he ranted, heat rising to his face due to anger.

He was cut short by a warm hand resting on his shoulder.

"Iggy. Dude. It's all right, 'kay?" America stared at him with an almost... Imploring look? No, that couldn't be right. England shook his head. "I'm serious, man." He felt his anger deflating at the somewhat peaceful colour of the American's eyes. "It's your own fault that you didn't think about it. Maybe you can do the same thing next time."

There.

He brushed America's hand off of his shoulder, eyes covered by his bangs.

"Git."

He lifted his head up and smiled slightly at the boy. He just couldn't stay mad at him…

* * *

"Where are you planning on staying?" England asked America as the latter kicked his feet through piles of leaves.

The air was chilly, to say the least. The sun was beginning to set, as the last of England's duties as a student were completed. For some reason, America had decided to trail after the British nation once he finished all of his lectures. England didn't mind. Although… The lad was a bit to handle. Like any other young schoolchild, he doodled and whispered in class, sometimes being unintentionally disruptive. He almost got asked to leave in England's Fine Arts course because he was laughing at a student's painting. At that particular point, England actually questioned his neutrality about his former brother following him to his classes, getting him in trouble. But, like before, he just could stay mad for long.

"Well, I actually have a place here, in Oxford," America replied, not even bothering to look England in the face.

"May I ask why…?" It wasn't as if some nations didn't own housing in their allies territories, for sake of travelling convenience, but… America owned an actual house in London already.

Sure enough, America pouted, "What, I wanted to have a house in Oxford. I'm teaching here for God's sake!"

"I see, I see…" England chuckled.

There was a silence between the two, but neither found it awkward. The crunching of fallen leaves beneath their feet was somewhat comforting.

_I wish we could spend more time just like this…_

After a while, America stopped walking. England looked at him questioningly.

"This is my stop." The American supplied. England's peridot eyes scanned over the substantial Victorian semi-detached house.

"... Why do you have such a nice house when you hardly ever stay here? Does anyone else live here when you're away?"

"Nope," America answered curtly as he unlocked the left door.

England gaped openly at his former colony. It made no sense. Just… Why…

"Dude, you live in a freakin' mansion. I don't really think you can say anything."

"Well, at least I live there all the time," England argued hotly.

"And who's to say I don't live here all the time?" America kicked the door open and walked inside, pausing a few steps in the doorway. He turned.

"You coming in or not?"

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**They're friends~ XD Yeah, I dunno, sometimes I'm overwhelmed by the fandom's OOC-ness. They argue a ton in reality. But I'm like, "My precious ship... They love each other. Deep down inside. QwQ" Although, I'm not exactly sure if this should turn out to be a USUK fic. Whatcha think? o3o**

**I'm totally awesome.**

**And been hanging out with Prussia too much. XD**

**Ciao~!**


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